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Local Man's Tongue Files Formal Complaint After Gruyère Ice Cream Turns Out to Be Delicious
A LaughParty comic take. A LaughParty comic take. Everything below is invented for entertainment, and no actual taste buds were harmed. In a turn of events that has shaken the dessert world to its waffle-cone foundations, a fictional man named Derek ordered a scoop of Gruyère cheese ice cream as a joke and was then personally betrayed when it tasted good.…
Local Frog Launches Motivational Career, Refuses to Acknowledge It Is a Frog
A LaughParty comic take. A LaughParty comic take. Everything below is invented, including the frog's business plan. Somewhere on the internet, a picture of a frog was posted with the caption 'motivative.' That's all we know. So naturally, we've imagined the frog's entire career as a life coach. Meet Gerald, a small green amphibian who sits on a lily pad w…
Oxford Comma Demands Raise, Cites Centuries of Unpaid Labor, Disrespect, and Being Ignored by AP Style
In a move that has sent shockwaves through the punctuation community, the Oxford Comma has formally submitted a request for a raise, citing "centuries of thankless labor, chronic underappreciation, and a hostile work environment." The irony of using itself in its own complaint was, according to sources, completely intentional. The request, delivered in a…
Tuxedoed Bird Steals Bodyboard, Claims He Was Born for This
A LaughParty comic take. A LaughParty comic take: the events below are invented for fun, loosely inspired by a real video of an African penguin hitching a ride on a bodyboard. No actual penguins were interviewed, mostly because they kept walking away. Beachgoers were reportedly stunned this week when a small African penguin, roughly the size of a bowling…
Local Man Joins Search Party, Becomes Its Most Wanted Member
A LaughParty comic take. LaughParty Comic Fiction: Everything below is made up. No real people, towns, or flashlights were harmed in the making of this story. The sleepy town of Puddleford Junction sprang into action Tuesday evening when word spread that Dale Wimbersnoot had vanished during the Puddleford Book Club's annual nature walk. Within the hour, f…
Neighbor's Anti-Speeding Sign Is Now Technically a Novel
A LaughParty comic take. Comic fiction: This is a made-up humor piece. No real neighbors, streets or plot-twisting lawn signs were harmed. For three years, residents of fictional Maple Crescent watched cars treat their quiet street like the final lap of a go-kart championship. Polite letters failed. A cardboard sign reading 'PLEASE SLOW DOWN' was ignored…
Local AI Promises Total Randomness, Picks 17 for the 4,000th Time
A LaughParty comic take. A LaughParty comic take. Everything below is invented, including the robot's feelings. In a breakthrough that has stunned absolutely no one who owns a calculator, a fictional chatbot named RandoMatic 9000 has been asked to pick a random number between 1 and 25 more than four thousand times. It has answered 17 every single time, wi…
Area Man Refuses to Blink During Tar Drop Livestream, Now on Day Four
A LaughParty comic take. Comic fiction: everything below is invented for laughs. No real scientists, viewers or eyeballs were harmed. In the fictional town of Dripton, the Institute for Extremely Patient Science has launched what it calls the most intense livestream in human history: a single blob of tar, hanging from a funnel, thinking about falling. The…
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Local Dog Delivers Oscar-Worthy Performance Over One Tiny Pill
A LaughParty comic take. Comic fiction: The following is an invented, satirical take on the universal struggle of giving a dog medicine. All characters and events are imaginary. Any resemblance to your own dog is, frankly, inevitable. In what critics are already calling "the most dramatic eleven seconds in household history," a fictional beagle named Sir…
Pants Bandit Strikes Again: Suburb Clutches Its Gym Bags
A LaughParty comic take. LaughParty Comic Take: Everything below is made-up satire inspired by an odd online post. No real neighbors, burglars, or trousers were interviewed. Residents of the fictional suburb of Pickle Creek are locking their doors, their windows and, most urgently, their laundry hampers. A mysterious figure has been stealing one item and…
Local Man Discovers Neighbour's WiFi Has Its Own Zip Code
A LaughParty comic take. LaughParty Comic Fiction: The following is a made-up humor piece. Any resemblance to your actual neighbours' internet is purely coincidental and probably a sign you should upgrade. For three glorious years, Dave Pembleton believed he was living in the digital future. His home WiFi had four bars. Four! He named it "Pembleton Palace…
Local Plastic Goose Has More Outfits Than Entire Street
A LaughParty comic take. A comic take: the events and characters below are entirely made up. No actual geese, plastic or otherwise, were consulted. Every neighborhood has a celebrity. Some have a retired weatherman. Some have a guy who once sneezed on a game show. Ours has Gerald, a two-foot plastic goose who stands on the Hendersons' front porch and has…
Local Hero Completes Three Crunches, Declares Abs 'Basically Done'
A LaughParty comic take. Comic fiction: The following is an entirely made-up, satirical story. Any resemblance to your own Tuesday is purely coincidental, though probably accurate. In a feat of athletic endurance that fitness experts are calling technically a thing that happened, fictional local man Darren Pluffet completed three full crunches on his livi…
Fortune Cookie Tries Radical Honesty, Ruins Everyone's Tuesday
A LaughParty comic take. Comic fiction: What follows is entirely made up, inspired by the universal experience of opening a free dessert and getting a mild emotional bruise. It began, as most great sagas do, with a takeout order. Our entirely fictional hero, Dana, requested lo mein, two spring rolls, and enough duck sauce to fill a birdbath. The food arri…
Local Inventor Unveils Cannon That Delivers Christmas Trees at 60 MPH
A LaughParty comic take. A LaughParty comic take. Everything below is invented, including the inventor, the town and the very confused reindeer. For generations, getting a Christmas tree home has followed a sacred ritual. You wander a frozen lot for two hours, reject forty perfectly good trees for being "too Charlie Brown" or "too aggressive," then strap…
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What Happens in Veda: Why the Dalai Lama Just Hit the Jackpot in Las Vegas
We all know the classic setup. The Dalai Lama walks into a pizza shop and asks the guy behind the counter to make him one with everything. It is a spiritual classic, right up there with the one about the monk who refuses to leave his cave because he has already reached the final level of Tetris. But recently, the rumor mill has been churning with a questi…
My Wife Can’t Watch Gladiator Without Fact Checking The Sandals
Marriage is a beautiful journey of compromise, growth, and, apparently, high-definition forensic investigation. For years, I assumed that my wife watched movies for the plot, the cinematography, or perhaps the gratuitous shots of Russell Crowe looking broodingly into the middle distance. It turns out I was wrong. My wife watches movies like a private inve…
10 Blunt Medical Truths From the Doctor Who Clearly Failed Bedside Manner School
We have all been there. You are sitting in a sterile medical waiting room, flipping through a copy of Highlights Magazine from 1994, trying to figure out where the hidden toothbrush is in the cartoon picture while your life hangs in the balance. When the doctor finally emerges, you do not want medical jargon. You do not want a lecture on cholesterol. You…
10 Things to Do in a Hospital Waiting Room That Are Less Depressing Than Thinking About Death
We have all been there. You are sitting in a sterile hospital waiting room, the smell of industrial grade floor wax is assaulting your nostrils, and you are waiting for a medical professional to give you the news. Your heart is pounding, your palms are sweaty, and you are desperately hoping for a sign that everything is going to be okay. Usually, this is…
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