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Goat Hits Snooze, Wakes Up to an Empty Pasture and Several Questions
A LaughParty comic take. A LaughParty comic take. Everything below is invented for laughs. No goats were harmed or fact-checked. Somewhere on a hillside that may or may not exist, a goat we will call Gerald opened one eye, then the other, then both again for good measure. The sun was high. The grass was quiet. And the forty-two goats who had been sleeping…
Man Answers Every Question With Total Accuracy, Leaves Auto Parts Store Empty-Handed
A LaughParty comic take. Comic fiction: the following events are entirely made up, much like my understanding of transmissions. Gary Pemberton, 44, of the fictional town of Mildew Falls, walked into a neighborhood auto parts store on Tuesday with one simple goal. Three hours later, he walked out with a laminated certificate of participation, a free air fr…
Local Man Bravely Sips Macaroni Soda, Reports Seeing His Ancestors Shake Their Heads
A LaughParty comic take. Comic fiction: The events, people and products in this article are invented for laughs. Any resemblance to an actual beverage is your fridge's problem, not ours. Humanity has achieved many things. We split the atom. We put a rover on Mars. We taught a phone to recognize our face even when we've just woken up looking like a startle…
Goose Family Portrait Ruined by Ducks With Agents
A LaughParty comic take. A LaughParty comic take. Everything below is invented, including the ducks' lawyer. The Honkington family had planned their annual portrait for weeks. Mother Goose had groomed every feather. Father Goose had practiced his dignified neck angle, which he calls The Swan Impersonation. The six goslings had been bribed with a whole sli…
Local Password '123456' Wins Lifetime Achievement Award, Refuses to Retire
A LaughParty comic take. Comic fiction: This satirical piece was inspired by recent headlines about weak passwords. Every person, place, and event below is made up. In a glittering ceremony held entirely inside a dusty server closet, the password 123456 received the prestigious Golden Padlock for Lifetime Achievement. It has guarded countless accounts wit…
Local Man's Tongue Files Formal Complaint After Gruyère Ice Cream Turns Out to Be Delicious
A LaughParty comic take. A LaughParty comic take. Everything below is invented for entertainment, and no actual taste buds were harmed. In a turn of events that has shaken the dessert world to its waffle-cone foundations, a fictional man named Derek ordered a scoop of Gruyère cheese ice cream as a joke and was then personally betrayed when it tasted good.…
Local Frog Launches Motivational Career, Refuses to Acknowledge It Is a Frog
A LaughParty comic take. A LaughParty comic take. Everything below is invented, including the frog's business plan. Somewhere on the internet, a picture of a frog was posted with the caption 'motivative.' That's all we know. So naturally, we've imagined the frog's entire career as a life coach. Meet Gerald, a small green amphibian who sits on a lily pad w…
Oxford Comma Demands Raise, Cites Centuries of Unpaid Labor, Disrespect, and Being Ignored by AP Style
In a move that has sent shockwaves through the punctuation community, the Oxford Comma has formally submitted a request for a raise, citing "centuries of thankless labor, chronic underappreciation, and a hostile work environment." The irony of using itself in its own complaint was, according to sources, completely intentional. The request, delivered in a…
Hangman
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Guess the hidden word, one letter at a time.
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Local Man Joins Search Party, Becomes Its Most Wanted Member
A LaughParty comic take. LaughParty Comic Fiction: Everything below is made up. No real people, towns, or flashlights were harmed in the making of this story. The sleepy town of Puddleford Junction sprang into action Tuesday evening when word spread that Dale Wimbersnoot had vanished during the Puddleford Book Club's annual nature walk. Within the hour, f…
Neighbor's Anti-Speeding Sign Is Now Technically a Novel
A LaughParty comic take. Comic fiction: This is a made-up humor piece. No real neighbors, streets or plot-twisting lawn signs were harmed. For three years, residents of fictional Maple Crescent watched cars treat their quiet street like the final lap of a go-kart championship. Polite letters failed. A cardboard sign reading 'PLEASE SLOW DOWN' was ignored…
Local AI Promises Total Randomness, Picks 17 for the 4,000th Time
A LaughParty comic take. A LaughParty comic take. Everything below is invented, including the robot's feelings. In a breakthrough that has stunned absolutely no one who owns a calculator, a fictional chatbot named RandoMatic 9000 has been asked to pick a random number between 1 and 25 more than four thousand times. It has answered 17 every single time, wi…
Area Man Refuses to Blink During Tar Drop Livestream, Now on Day Four
A LaughParty comic take. Comic fiction: everything below is invented for laughs. No real scientists, viewers or eyeballs were harmed. In the fictional town of Dripton, the Institute for Extremely Patient Science has launched what it calls the most intense livestream in human history: a single blob of tar, hanging from a funnel, thinking about falling. The…
Local Pet Opens Exclusive Eye Clinic for Stuffed Animals, Accepts No Insurance
A LaughParty comic take. A LaughParty comic take. Everything below is fiction, invented purely for giggles. In a quiet living room somewhere between the couch and the radiator, a small furry professional named Babka has built a thriving private practice. His specialty is toy ophthalmology. His success rate is a perfect 100 percent, if success means every…
Tiles
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Shuffle your way to order in the classic number puzzle.
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Pants Bandit Strikes Again: Suburb Clutches Its Gym Bags
A LaughParty comic take. LaughParty Comic Take: Everything below is made-up satire inspired by an odd online post. No real neighbors, burglars, or trousers were interviewed. Residents of the fictional suburb of Pickle Creek are locking their doors, their windows and, most urgently, their laundry hampers. A mysterious figure has been stealing one item and…
Local Man Discovers Neighbour's WiFi Has Its Own Zip Code
A LaughParty comic take. LaughParty Comic Fiction: The following is a made-up humor piece. Any resemblance to your actual neighbours' internet is purely coincidental and probably a sign you should upgrade. For three glorious years, Dave Pembleton believed he was living in the digital future. His home WiFi had four bars. Four! He named it "Pembleton Palace…
Local Plastic Goose Has More Outfits Than Entire Street
A LaughParty comic take. A comic take: the events and characters below are entirely made up. No actual geese, plastic or otherwise, were consulted. Every neighborhood has a celebrity. Some have a retired weatherman. Some have a guy who once sneezed on a game show. Ours has Gerald, a two-foot plastic goose who stands on the Hendersons' front porch and has…
Local Hero Completes Three Crunches, Declares Abs 'Basically Done'
A LaughParty comic take. Comic fiction: The following is an entirely made-up, satirical story. Any resemblance to your own Tuesday is purely coincidental, though probably accurate. In a feat of athletic endurance that fitness experts are calling technically a thing that happened, fictional local man Darren Pluffet completed three full crunches on his livi…
Fortune Cookie Tries Radical Honesty, Ruins Everyone's Tuesday
A LaughParty comic take. Comic fiction: What follows is entirely made up, inspired by the universal experience of opening a free dessert and getting a mild emotional bruise. It began, as most great sagas do, with a takeout order. Our entirely fictional hero, Dana, requested lo mein, two spring rolls, and enough duck sauce to fill a birdbath. The food arri…
Local Inventor Unveils Cannon That Delivers Christmas Trees at 60 MPH
A LaughParty comic take. A LaughParty comic take. Everything below is invented, including the inventor, the town and the very confused reindeer. For generations, getting a Christmas tree home has followed a sacred ritual. You wander a frozen lot for two hours, reject forty perfectly good trees for being "too Charlie Brown" or "too aggressive," then strap…
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