Local Grandpa Sees City in Two Colors, Calls It "Best Day Out Since 1974"

A LaughParty comic take.

A LaughParty comic take. Everything below is fiction, loosely inspired by a viral photo of a grandfather wearing 3D movie glasses as sunglasses. No real grandpas were interviewed, though several fictional ones insisted on it.

It began, as most great expeditions do, with a grandson saying, "Grandpa, it's sunny, did you bring sunglasses?" Grandpa Walt, 81, patted his shirt pocket with the confidence of a man who has never once been wrong about eyewear and unfolded a pair of cardboard frames with one red lens and one blue lens.

"Polarized," he announced. They were not polarized. They were souvenirs from a 1983 screening of a movie about a shark, a sequel to a sequel.

What followed, according to our completely imaginary reporting, was the most immersive tour the city has ever offered.

Stop One: The Downtown Fountain. Walt watched the water arc into the air and took a full step backward. "That fountain's coming right at us," he whispered. His grandson explained that fountains generally stay put. Walt nodded slowly, a man who had seen things, and kept one hand raised in case.

Stop Two: The Art Museum. Here the glasses truly shone. A modern painting that critics call "a bold exploration of beige" became, through Walt's lenses, a swirling purple masterpiece. He stood before it for twenty minutes. A docent asked what he saw. "Depth," Walt replied. The docent quietly put on her own reading glasses and squinted at the canvas, deeply unsettled.

Stop Three: Lunch. Walt ordered the soup because, as he put it, "the salad looks like it's hovering." The waiter, sensing a regular in the making, brought extra napkins and a pair of crayons, just in case the 3D experience called for audience participation.

Stop Four: The Observation Deck. Forty stories up, Walt surveyed the skyline. Tourists around him pointed out landmarks. Walt pointed out that the clouds were "popping." A small child in line asked if his glasses came with the ticket. Within minutes, six strangers wanted to know where he'd gotten them. Walt told each one, "You had to be there," which was true, because the theater closed decades ago.

By late afternoon, the grandson had stopped trying to correct anything. Why would he? Grandpa was having the time of his life, every pigeon was a special effect, and the city had never looked so red on one side and blue on the other.

On the drive home, Walt dozed off, glasses still on, smiling like someone who'd just watched the end credits of a really good film. His grandson made a mental note: next trip, bring actual sunglasses.

Then he reconsidered. Some views are better in 3D.

Remember: this story is comic fiction. If your own grandparent wears movie glasses in public, please respect their artistic vision and perhaps offer them a hat.

Inspired by I took my grandfather on a day trip to explore the city, he brought along his “sunglasses” which are actually 3D Movie Glasses.