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The Ultimate Core Strength Discovery
My fitness trainer told me that the most effective way to engage my core and truly feel the burn was to perform three sets of 'The Accountant’s Plank.'
Cat Math: The Terrifying Physics of Why Your Feline Thinks Your Face Is a Landing Pad at 3 AM
If you have ever shared a living space with a feline, you know that they do not obey the laws of physics, the mandates of the local government, or the ...
7 Signs Your Former English Teacher Is Currently Grading This Headline in Their Head
We all remember that one English teacher. You know the one—the person who treated a misplaced comma like a personal insult and acted as if the "I be ...
5 Reasons Your Lizard Brain Is Wrong and Why You Should Never Touch That Tail
We’ve all been there. You’re at a party, or perhaps a high-stakes business meeting at a petting zoo, and you see something so fluffy, so majestic, ...
OSHA’s Final Boss: Why Thailand’s Infrastructure Is Held Together by Vibes and Audacity
If you’ve spent any time on the internet recently, you’ve likely encountered a photo from Thailand that defies all logic, physics, and possibly se ...
5 Stages of Grief Experienced After Realizing You Are Losing the Argument You Started
We’ve all been there. You’re deep in an argument, your veins are pumping with the righteous adrenaline of someone who is 100% certain they are cor ...
Local Man Decides Bumper Damage Is Actually a Bold Artistic Choice and ‘Gary’ From Insurance Can’t Stop Him
We’ve all been there. You’re backing out of a tight spot at the grocery store, distracted by the siren song of a discounted rotisserie chicken, an ...
10 People Who Clearly Downloaded the Coordination DLC While You’re Still Running on Glitchy Human Software
We’ve all been there: you try to walk and chew gum at the same time, and suddenly your legs forget how to "leg," resulting in a graceful stumble tha ...
Hostage Negotiator or Preschool Teacher? 12 Signs Your Students Are Actually Tiny Dictators
Working in early childhood education is a lot like being a hostage negotiator, except the person across the table is sticky, doesn’t know how to use ...
The Body Condition Score: A Guide to the Poster That Thinks Your Dog Is Fat and You Are a Failure
There is no place on earth quite as humbling as a veterinarian’s waiting room. It is a land where the air smells of industrial-strength lavender and ...
Forget Gucci: Why This Local Cat Is Rocking a Kroger Bag for Feline Fashion Week
In the high-stakes, cutthroat world of feline fashion, we’ve seen it all. We’ve seen the "bread-loafing" look, the "I’m-too-good-for-this-kibble ...
Why the "Inbus" Is the Unholy Union of Public Transit and Private Regret Your Living Room Never Asked For
In the grand hierarchy of human inventions, we usually have a clear divide. You have the "In-House" things (toilets, Wi-Fi, the existential dread of a ...
Man With Way Too Much Free Time Rewrites Toto’s Africa to Be Geographically Accurate
There are two types of people in this world: those who think "Africa" by Toto is the greatest achievement in the history of human composition, and lia ...
System Maintenance Required: Your Brain’s Fear Storage Is Full and Cannot Accept New Doomsday Scenarios
I recently received a notification on my internal dashboard that I didn’t even know existed. It wasn’t a reminder to drink water or a nudge to fin ...
The Lice Strategy
Telling my daughter's date that "she has lice and it's very contagious the closer you get to her."
