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A Tall Order

Short people are oppressed.

Mom Jokes

I don't always tell mom jokes.

The Reptilian Runner-Up

A man submitted a joke about alligators with ED to a pun competition...

A Murder Most Fowl

What do you call a group of chickens dressed up like crows?

The Dad Thermostat

My dad installed a lock on the thermostat. Then he hid the key.

Landlord Logistics

They say love is worth more than money.

The Apathetic World

The number one problem in the world today is apathy.

Spicy Afterlife

What will the "Red Hot Chili Peppers" become when they die?

The Lice Strategy

Telling my daughter's date that "she has lice and it's very contagious the closer you get to her."

A Murderous Sight

I witnessed a murder today..

Penny for your thoughts

TIL it costs more money to make a penny than how much it's worth

Condescending Definitions

People tell me that I'm condescending

Musical Feces

What's brown and sounds like a bell?

Medical Temperament

How are doctors so well tempered even under heavy stress?

The Uncertain Bar Crawl

Two skeptics walk into a bar..

Aquatic Arachnids

Why are spiders good swimmers?

A Stolen Throne

Toilet stolen from police station.

A Colorful Mystery

What is Red and Smells like Blue Paint?

The Dog Email

My dog sent me an email the other day.

The Extroverted Engineer

How do you tell who the extroverted engineers are?

Heavy Bones

How much does a corpse weigh?