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Found 703 results for "jokes"

The PTA Strategy

Hitting on women at this PTA meeting

My Body Filed a Complaint

I asked my doctor why my knees pop, my back cracks, and my shoulders click every time I move. He said my body is just trying to communicate with me. I asked what it's saying.

Noble Silence

I told a joke about noble gasses the other day.

The Nutritionist's Loophole

My nutritionist said that instead of eating three big cheeseburgers,

A Heavy Snack

I weighed myself today,

The Croc Critique

A pair of crocs sitting on a riverbank ask each other why people hate them.

Quoting the Quotes

Please make sure

The Parent Performance

Most of being a parent means saying "Great!!" when your kid insists you watch him perform an unidentifiable skill.

Swipe Right

I used to have a phone with a really good user interface...

My Son Isn't Mine?

I was very upset when my wife told me our son wasn't mine.

Eight-Armed Envy

What animal do I respect most? The octopus.

The DIY Expert's Confession

I spent all weekend watching tutorial videos, carefully measuring twice, and selecting the perfect tools before tackling my first home improvement project.

Vain Twig

What do you call a twig that won't stop looking in the mirror?

Fitness Trail Motivation

We got a notice at work that a coyote had been spotted on the fitness trail,

High Stakes Career

What happened to the trapeze artist that did drugs on the job?

The Breakfast Paradox

'No you can't have cake! Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Here, eat this fried flour with butter and maple syrup.'

The Long-Awaited Answer

* Gets out of a 10 year old coma * Me: Where am I?

Dairy Logic

Why did the milking stool only have three legs?

A Heavyweight Queue

What do you call a queue of boxers?

Llama Zen

What did the yogi say after riding his pet llama to the ashram?

Stubborn Steeds

Horses are very contrarian...