Protip: Never take your wife with you to your annual checkup.
She will tell the doctor way too much about you.
My computer kept asking me to restart to finish installing updates. I ignored it for six months. Finally, I gave in and restarted. When it came back on, it just displayed one message:
I told my doctor I was worried about my memory getting worse as I age. He said the good news is there's a simple trick to remember everything, just associate new information with something you already know really well.
My boss just announced that we are going to start having a daily 'Efficiency Synergy Session' to discuss why we aren't getting our work done on time.
I asked my calendar why it seemed so stressed around the end of December. It said it had too many dates to keep track of. I told it to just take things one day at a time.
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