Jokes
All kinds of jokes - one-liners, puns, dad jokes, and more!
1,187 posts
The Stationary Bike Commute
I’ve been training on a stationary bike for three hours every morning to prepare for my new job, but I’m starting to think the HR department lied to me.
The Mona Lisa Date
[first date] Me: *don't let him know you're the Mona Lisa* Him: You look nice tonight
Block Fires Half Its Humans After Realizing Robots Don't Need Mental Health Days or Artisanal Coffee
In a move that surprised absolutely no one who has been paying attention to the slow, metallic takeover of our society, Block, the company formerly kn ...
The Doctor's Leg
Doctor: *taps knee with mallet* feel that? Me: No. Doctor: or this? *jabs toe with a pin* Me: Nah.
The Sourdough Starter Intervention
My wife asked why I was whispering while making dinner, and I told her the yeast was resting and I didn't want to wake it up. She rolled her eyes and said I was taking the 'artisanal bread' hobby too far.
The Spreadsheet Escape Artist
Why did the overworked accountant suddenly decide to hide inside his own Excel document?
The Low Pressure Promotion
The local meteorologist was thrilled to get a massive promotion, but his friends were confused because he never actually got the forecast right. When they asked how he landed a senior leadership role despite his terrible track record, he just smiled.
The Scale Manufacturer's Dilemma
Did you hear about the production delays at that company that makes scales using lengthy pipes?
