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The Cinema Nomad

Lately I go to the restroom at the movies, but forget where I'm seated

The Moose-Ant Dilemma

What's the difference between a moose and an ant?

Babysitting Blunders

I was asked to babysit once but it didn't go very well.

Geometry Lesson

Why can't a person draw a perfect circle?

Doctor: "I'm sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live."

Patient: "What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?!"

The Paranoid Bulb

How many paranoids does it take to change a lightbulb?

Mitten Misunderstandings

Today I have learnt - if you try and give someone the finger whilst wearing mittens,

Reptilian Refreshments

What did the Alligator say to the turtle?

Pigeon Beats

Pigeons always look like they're jamming out to an invisible iPod.

Political Pollination

Why do the bees have honey? Because they have a queen.

Optimistic Cruising

I got my wife tickets on a cruise ship.

The Real Answer

It's an age-old question, but which came first, the chicken or the egg?

Holiday Herd

How do sheep greet each other at Christmas?

Botanical Romance

What did the plant say to the other plant that it really liked a lot?

The Battery Blues

A battery's life sucks.

A Royal Dispute

Henry Tudor: "I'm going to build a car park in the centre of Leicester."

The Donut Dilemma

My diet always starts on a Monday morning

Fishy Business

Why did the trout leave the cult?

Whenever somebody asks us how long we've been married...

Whenever somebody asks us how long we've been married, we always answer:

Beethoven's Doorbell Dilemma

Why did Beethoven never answer the doorbell?

The Vibe Check

Level of Spanish -