Jokes
All kinds of jokes - one-liners, puns, dad jokes, and more!
3,745 posts
Meeting Called 'Quick Sync' Outlasts Two Coffee Refills and One Change of Season
The calendar invite promised 15 minutes and asked everyone to keep it brief.
Realtor Lists Hall Closet as 'Cozy Starter Home With Excellent Hanging Space'
The listing says it's a charming, affordable property for first-time buyers.
Group Chat Spends Six Weeks Planning Dinner, Settles on Vibes
Eight friends compared calendars, debated cuisines and ran four separate polls.
Preschooler Negotiates Bedtime Like a Seasoned Union Rep
My four-year-old agreed to bedtime only after securing two stories, one water and a nightlight.
Phone Charger Arrives Wrapped in Four Boxes, Now Under Witness Protection
My tiny charger came inside four boxes, two air pillows and a mountain of crinkle paper.
Rider Leaves One-Star Review for City Bus, Bus Responds Publicly
I gave the 7:15 bus one star for showing up at 7:40.
Microwave Finishes Cooking, Begins Passive-Aggressive Follow-Up
My microwave beeps three times when my food is ready.
Clearance Item Labeled 'Like New' Raises Philosophical Questions
I bought a clearance item labeled like new.
Laugh Slots
Hit spin. Start grinning.
Ten spins. Match the reels, build a streak, and beat your best score.
Play Laugh SlotsPhilosopher Opens Escape Room With No Exit, Only Follow-Up Questions
A local philosophy teacher opened a Socrates-themed escape room.
Container Lid Reunited With Its Original Bowl After Seven Years Apart
While cleaning the kitchen cabinet, I finally found the matching pieces.
Man Looks Up One Quick Fact, Resurfaces as Expert in Medieval Cheese Disputes
At 9:02 PM, Dave searched 'how long to boil an egg.'
Imaginary Quarterback Calls Audible, Offensive Line Requests It in Writing
In this fictional game, the quarterback changes the play at the last second.
Man Says 'Let's Grab Coffee Sometime,' Accidentally Signs Binding Contract
I told an old classmate, 'We should totally grab coffee sometime.'
Houseplant Thrives Only When It Believes I've Moved Away
I watered my fern daily, gave it sunlight and played it soft jazz. It nearly died.
Cafe Introduces Pricing Based on How Tired You Look
My local cafe now charges customers by exhaustion level.
Seal Pup Joins Morning Surf Session, Questions Everyone's Outfit
A baby seal shows up every morning to catch waves with the local surfers.
Reply-All Chain Becomes Company's Most Active Community
Someone hit reply-all to tell everyone to stop hitting reply-all.
Poker
Keep your cards. Lose your frown.
Five-card draw, just for fun. Hold, draw and enjoy the hand.
Play PokerMagic Wand Requires Premium Subscription
I bought a magic wand online, and it came with a 47-page terms of service.
Junk Drawer Has a Secret Leader
I finally cleaned out my junk drawer and found three dead batteries and a key that opens nothing.
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