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The Nutritionist's Loophole

My nutritionist said that instead of eating three big cheeseburgers,

The Pirate's Milestone

What does a Pirate say on his Eightieth birthday?

Academic Overachievers

Sometimes I do things to children that they're too young to understand...

Cheesy Humor

Wanna hear a joke about Kraft Macaroni and Cheese?

The Gum Solution

This one time I swallowed a gum and my mom told me that "it stays in your system forever,"

Snowman Sniffing

Two snowmen in a field, one turns to the other and says...

Market Volatility

I lost 40 Pounds in 4 months!!

The Flintstone Difference

What is the difference between the people in Dubai & the people in Abu Dhabi?

A Grilling Mistake

ME: hey baby. HOT GIRL: ... ME: ... HOT GIRL: ... ME: *looks closer* HOT GRILL: ME:

Sharknado Fears

We got a tornado warning, and I'm too scared to open my windows.

A Brick-Built Elf

What do you call an elf made of lego?

Weasel Words

What's the difference between a weasel and a stoat?

Financial Botany

They say money doesn't grow on trees.

Commuter's Cramp

I'm getting tired of riding to work from New Jersey to Manhattan with my neighbors.

The Literal Bar

A guy walks into a bar...

A Heavy Snack

I weighed myself today,

Linguistic Murder

Did you "ask" me or "axe" me?

Can I tell you a joke?

Your bum broke! hahaha!

Nudist Colony Investigation

Someone broke a hole in the nudist colony's fence.

Humility Forecast

Teacher: We're going to need you to work with your daughter on humility.

The Croc Critique

A pair of crocs sitting on a riverbank ask each other why people hate them.